Confidence is the best beauty mark
Monday, September 17, 2012 at 6:46AM I was never the pretty girl growing up. I wasn't rich, either, nor did I have a sparkling personality to offset the ugliness and the lack of beautiful expensive things in my life. What I did have going for me was my intelligence. I wasn't the brightest in my class but I was the only one who devoured fiction and dreamed of worlds beyond my own, adventures beyond my imagination.
What I had was a strong sense of identity and purpose. I knew who I am, what kind of skills were at my disposal, and I knew what I wanted out of my life. Was I wrong about how I identified myself or my goals? I think that's the single biggest potential blow to anyone's self-confidence: how sure, how secure can you be about your identity and purpose? Answer: you're only as sure as you allow yourself to be. No one else should help you with that but yourself.
My motto then (and even now) is this: no guts, no glory. Or put less dramatically, if you don't do something, then nothing happens. That's just common sense but I know a lot of people who are afraid to try something because they're not perfect enough. Can't sing in public because they miss a few notes. Can't speak in public because they lisp. Can't wear a mini-skirt because they have marks on their legs. Can't quit a full-time job they hate because they're not sure they can make it as a freelancer.
Well I have news for you, toots: you'll never be perfect enough. Work with what you have and just. Do. It.
That said, I do believe in constant self-improvement. It pays to work on your skills and knowledge, on your wardrobe and makeup, to create the best possible version of yourself. :) Confidence for me is loving and knowing yourself so well that you know exactly where to change; in being uncompromising when doing it.
That's why I like Tupperware Brand's campaign called the Chain of Confidence. It's a global, multi-awarded campaign that encourages women to be more confident and happy about themselves. In line with the campaign, they have chosen Bianca Valerio to be their spokesperson. Perfect right? As a bullied girl, Bianca grew up with damaged self-esteem, but now look at her! She's s successful and confident. :)
So, what makes you confident? Visit www.facebook.com/tupperwarebrandsph/iamconfidence and send your message of confidence to your friends!
There's also a contest where you can nominate your woman of confidence – she can be your wife, mother, sister or friend. Send your nominations starting August 30, 2012. Nomination forms can be downloaded from the Tupperware Brands Philippines Fan Page. Simply like the page and click on the I Am Confidence tab to download form. Then send the duly accomplished form together with your nominee’s confidence story to stories@confidence.ph. Only stories written by a nominator will be accepted. Nominations of one’s self will be disqualified.
Let your woman of confidence be recognized! For complete details, mechanics and details check out I Am Confidence in Facebook, and the I Am Confidence microsite, www.confidence.ph. You may also visit the Tupperware Brands Philippines website at www.tupperwarebrands.ph.
Reader Comments (18)
This post is somethinc close to my heart. I don't know why but sometimes I tend to lack confidence. I was one gutsy girl as a child, never afraid to perform in front of a crowd. That changed in high school. i know I'm smart enough, good enough, but it was the fear of failure that gets to me. I try to keep negative thoughts at bay at present, and try to have a mindset that failures can only mean success is up ahead if I work harder and have more faith in myself. I also give myself a break now, and don't chastise myself for every mistake. Definitely happier and a little more confident. Baby steps before I could run! I admire Tupperware Brand for coming up with this campaign. I could think of some women who have inspired me with their confidence and self-knowledge. Thanks for posting this Liz!
I envy those who are strong enough to get away with all the identity crisis. Confidence has always been an issue for me and I guess the thought of "being yourself" is as difficult as solving a calculus problem. This post and tupperware really brought light to us who are a little bit in between with ourselves. :)
by the way Liz, I'm hosting a giveaway at my blog, I would appreciate it so much if some of your avid readers would join. :) thanks!!
This topic touches the heart of most women. Women are easily distraught with low self esteem and it takes a lot of courage and of course real friends to fight it and eventually see the real you. Confidence is everything.
I can relate to this so much as well. SO MUCH. I was an introvert growing up in the Middle East to very protective and conservative parents. There, women... how do I put this into words, women had A LOT of restrictions, from having a very sheltered life to not being able to voice out their opinions freely without being criticized by the religious police (muttawa) there, , even being your own person independently there is out of the question, you are expected to be submissive there in many ways, even just going out alone to the mall isnt allowed unless youre accompanied by a male chaperone, most likely a male cousin, father or brother.
I wont enumerate it further but you get the picture. And this affected not only my confidence, my self-esteem but also my entire outlook in life. Holding myself back most of the time, thinking I was never ever to be good enough on my own especially when your parents tell you this, you start to believe it... Insecurities, fear of failure, fear of disappointment, fear of not amounting to anything, even fear of not being enough to be loved by any man because I wasn't beautiful, smart or sexy enough--- all this gets to you after awhile. It took me a very loooongg time to remove myself from that way of thinking, to be where I am now.
My turning point was coming here to the Philippines... Being here has helped me get past that... Meeting new people, being in a dynamic environment, and most of all being able to have my own job and place. Doing all this on my own. Its good to know that Tupperware came up with a campaign like this, alot of women can relate to this including myself. I will definitely check this out.
I apologize for such a lengthy comment, this post really, really hit a spot for me... Thank you so much for being so honest with this post and for sharing your experience, Ms. Liz! :)
P.S. > Ms. Liz, if you dont mind my asking, I was wondering and also out of curiosity, what was your turning point?
Very well said Liz, angdaming quotable quotes dito. As in. Can relate much. I grew up as an ugly duckling and I waited kung kelan magiging beautiful swan ako. But I was wrong. Stop waiting and do something about it. After I graduated, I started on putting make-up and yun, feel ko maganda na talaga ko. Iba pa rin ang confidence. As you said constant self-improvement is vital to becoming the person you want to be. I strive to be the best version of myself everyday. Kasi I will never be perfect. There will always be other people who are prettier, taller, smoother, smarter than me. Pero dedma! Sabi nga nila, the only person you should be competing with is the person you were yesterday.
Thanks for posting this!
@Nin Happy to hear that! :D
@MsHabibi thank you for sharing your story! i'm happy you were able to get out of that fear of not being accepted.
My turning point? My parents have always been supportive of me. They always encouraged me to be anyone I want to be so I grew up believing in myself. Of course there were times I felt miserable that I wasn't like the popular girls, but getting my own stick of foundation changed all that. :)
Confidence is the key to everything - if you believe how smart, pretty, sexy you are, it will resemble from inside and out to yourself and will carry you better throughout the way. Many people lack confidence because they "care" or compare people too much about their weaknesses and what they "lack" than taking a look at what they can do best instead to lift themselves up. If people will just erase all these insecurities, then they'll be confident of themselves. This boosts happiness too because if one is happy with what he/she can, have and do, everything will be simply attractive - think of it and apply it and law of attraction will just submit to one's desires. Be confident, think positive and positive things will happen in an instant. :)
True that Joanna! If only people aren't hindered by insecurities then a lot of them will be confident and will have a personal sense of worth, security, and peace of mind.
I'm blessed that I grew up in a family with strong values. My titas taught me to believe in myself and love what you have and what you are because we are created unique and special. Sometimes its the stereotypes that sets us back, but we just got to remember, at the end of the day, its just gonna be you and God. Even if you have no one, God is there for you and He loves you no matter what your insecurities are.
Great article Liz :). True enough, confidence should be the best beauty mark :))
By far my favorite post of yours, Liz. A lot of women could relate to this because at some point in our lives, we have become the girl who was never pretty ENOUGH, not smart ENOUGH, etc. I like when you wrote: You'll never be perfect enough. Work with what you have and just do it. I too grew up not being the prettiest or the richest but I was lucky and smart enough to be able to finish Med school. I can say Im knowledgeable enough to know what works for me to be the best version of myself and that makes me quite beautiful. Beauty depends on how you see and conduct yourself. Ha... (deep sigh). Your words are quite empowering. Keep it up Ms Liz! :)
I am a woman full of fears and insecurities. I always feel so ugly. I'm always self-conscious. And oftentimes, it tortures me.
"I know a lot of people who are afraid to try something because they're not perfect enough. Can't sing in public because they miss a few notes. Can't speak in public because they lisp. Can't wear a mini-skirt because they have marks on their legs. Can't quit a full-time job they hate because they're not sure they can make it as a freelancer."
Grabe!!! Akong-ako yang tinutukoy mo. I'm so pathetic. Lolz! And you know what Ms. Liz, I'm about to write you a letter. Kasi, ayoko na! I want to ask for advice on how to have or increase my self-confidence. So, i've visited your site. Then, I saw this post. God really knows what I need to read and hear. Bull's eye! No guts, no glory is my motto too. Oh well, for less than a month pa lang. Hehe... If you have time, please take a look at my blog. I've used that motto as my tag line. I always tell that to myself, everyday. If not, I will surely make my blog private. I will surely delete my facebook page. 'Coz I feel so embarrassed. OA. And I'm not even young anymore. :(
Maybe my blog is my turning point. And I've written something for myself, to remind me, to be courageous, to spread my wings and fly. It's private. Lolz. This is the first time I'm sharing that link. Again, if you have time lang po, please feel free to read it.
I hope to have an opportunity to chat with you soon. You're one of my inspirations! So true.
And I'm so thankful, there is a campaign like this. I.really.need.this.
I dont know about you guys, but me? Whenever i put my red lipstick on, i get to have that extra shot pf confidence!;)
I super admire this post of yours, Ms. Liz :)
Yes, I totally agree that when you know your identity and purpose, you can always go forward and do the things you love. Confidence really makes a lot in one's life. To improve yourself is not bad but will eventually let you be more of confident than before.
JUST BE YOURSELF. LOVE YOUR SELF. because in this world, only you can love yourself unconditionally. ACCEPT WHO YOU ARE AND FACE EVERY PROBLEM THAT COMES IN YOUR WAY, CONFIDENTLY :) whatever you think of yourself, it will also be what others will think of you. so for that, ENJOY LIFE and LOVE LIFE. :)
Thank you Ms. Liz for sharing your stories. You are a great blogger and you inspire me to start having my own blog. Well, let's see! I would love to explore on that and hopefully, soon!
i think i need to read and read this post of you liz until my little brain understands. i confess that i have so little confidence growing up (well, until now naman)...i'm sure you'll be surprised to know that but yeah. probably i tend to look like i am confident, but really, i am not. i am really insecure, and walang lumipas na araw na hindi ko nahanapan ng mali ang sarili ko. probably that's why i am always tired. i always try so hard to please people, and live up to their expectations. but still, people would find something wrong with how i look, or what i do. i remember back in school, whenever there's recitations, i would tell my seatmate the answer to the teacher's question. only because i am scared that i might be wrong or i might say it in a funny way or well, takot lang ako na tignan talga ng mga tao. yes, i am that insecure. i passed up on a lot of opportunities in school and even at work. ang duwag ko. ..
until now i am trying to assess myself. i need to find where i'm good at, honestly wala pa ako makita. LOL. whenever people would say i am good in applying amkeup, i would think "halos lahat naman na ngaun eh" so it's nothing special. lost pa din ang peg ko. at tama bang dito ako mag-emote? hahahaa im just happy for u liz. for a young woman like you, i am so happy that you are where you are now. keep it up!
@Liz Lanuzo Thank you for your response. You're blessed to have a strong sense of self early on and supportive parents. And yes, I have slowly embraced myself, taking baby steps accepting my strengths, imperfections and all. It made me realize that these are exactly what makes us unique and beautifully human in our own special way. It took awhile but it also made me appreciate who I am even more now. Cheers to you Ms. Liz! :)
That's great Jaja and Lian! Let's get the confidence burning! :)
I used to have zero self-confidence in my early teens. I didn't think I was beautiful, and that beautiful only meant someone with flawless white skin, super straight hair, and a small frame. Growing up and being exposed to different people who were open-minded and accepting made me realize that beauty comes from loving who you are and being comfortable in your own skin. I didn't use those whitening soaps anymore, I tried everything from sports, dancing, art, etc., and I made peace with the fact that my gene pool have given me hips that are great for child-bearing. HAHA It's great that more and more people in the world have become aware that there is no cookie-cutter definition for beauty. Good job to the different people and organizations promoting self-confidence and loving one's self.
"I was never the pretty girl growing up. I wasn't rich, either, nor did I have a sparkling personality to offset the ugliness and the lack of beautiful expensive things in my life. What I did have going for me was my intelligence. I wasn't the brightest in my class but I was the only one who devoured fiction and dreamed of worlds beyond my own, adventures beyond my imagination. "
Well said Ms. Liz. I really related to this and the part where you said that people are afraid to try because they want to be perfect. This post has really helped me see that I can do anything if I just let go. Forget about insecurities and self-criticism. Just be and do. Now of to get a job! Ahaha. Maraming salamat po. :D
I feel pretty emotional when i read this, I remember when I was a kid I used to be an "outcast" at school, I cried crying home, and I have this inborn super obvious skin asthma that looks contagious which add up to the list of being an "outcast" I was one of the top students but my classmates just talks to me when there's quiz, etc. I feel happy then, that at least they talk to me in that way. My mom even wants to take me to a psychologist as shes afraid it might affect my personality as a child growing up . then when I went to high school, it was a totally different scenario, I was able to talk more, I was one of the class joker and everyone seems to be my friend. I discover my talents and my girl friends are kikays and that time that they helped me dress up properly. :) I'm turning 24 tomorrow and high school is one of the best memories of my life ;)
I love this! I will quote this on my diary: "It pays to work on your skills and knowledge, on your wardrobe and makeup, to create the best possible version of yourself. :)"
Thanks Ms. Liz!