Reader question: Help! I'm hairy!
Wednesday, June 27, 2012 at 8:12AM Got this interesting question over at Ask Liz. Read on!
Hi Ms. Liz! I don't know if I'm really asking a question or just seeking affirmation...I'm really "balbon": my arms and legs are hairy (but not like a man's, whew, could've been worse right?). Worse, I have facial hair! I have "baby bangs" that aren't really part of my "real hair" anymore (they're more facial hair than real hair because it's on my forehead already), and I can't even have the part above my eyebrows threaded for fear that it'll look really weird!
But I guess the worst part of it all is that I have a moustache! Eek! I really want to have it removed but I don't want to deal with it growing (thus I do not want it waxed). I would really love to have it lasered but that's too expensive, and I'm just in my early twenties! :(
I guess my real question is, is it really a problem? I used to not mind about my legs because my hair there is not even really thick, but it's plentiful...nor my arms, because a lot of girls have hairy arms... I'm so conscious about my facial hair though. :( I guess it's just everyone's perception of beauty that's making me want to have it removed...
Do you have any advice for me? Any kind (but sincere!) words would do.
Thank you Ms. Liz, and any answer from you would do. :)
I do think it's unfair that us women are persecuted for having hair in our face, arms, legs, and even down there. What's so bad about hair, when everyone has it in all the "wrong" places anyway? I hate it that we're forced to feel self-conscious about something that is a natural part of ourselvers but hey, that's the cost of living in human society.
There are many definitions of beauty and most of them are of course very subjective. It depends on the location and culture. For example Europeans aren't crazy about waxing or shaving their armpits; Americans are religious about brazilians and being almost hairless in general. But I think that there's another way to look at it.
Hair casts a shadow on skin and can obscure our features. So the hairier you are, the more uneven or dirty your skin appears. Hair is also a a receptacle of sweat and oil from our skin, so they may sometimes amplify our natural body odor and make us feel stickier.
If you look at it this way, clearing out our body hair is just basic good grooming. Less hair (especially on the eyebrows and upper lip) means our features are enhanced and more litaw. So yes, I think it's important to remove hair where they are the most obvious because people respect and appreciate a woman who looks like she takes care of herself.
I suggest you have your hair waxed or threaded so that the hair grows back slowly. It takes about three weeks to a month before the hair becomes obvious again, so it's not too bad! ;)
Hope this helps!
Reader Comments (9)
I also struggle with excessive hair on my face... so to the girl who wrote the letter: I understand how you feel. It may seem weird at first to groom the area above your brows, but a good threading technician will understand the need and she will be able to make it look as natural as possible. For the upper lips, I had some laser sessions, which are expensive but definitely worth it.
I've even had a dermatologist remark on how hairy my face is. I was really, really pissed off because she didn't exactly say it in a nice or even professional way. Having excessive facial hair really does make one more self-conscious, and I agree with what Liz said-- it's not fair, but women are held up to that hair-free standard. You just have to learn how to manage it, and it is possible. :) But DO NOT BLEACH your upper lip hair if you are a morena. That only works on light skinned people. haha.
Try facial hair bleaching kits from Sally Hansen, about 500 bucks a pop, available in Watsons or PCX. Effects last for upto month or til the hair grows out again. Might be more expensive than getting it threaded, but not as painful and damaging to the skin (just a little sting that tells you it's time to wash off the foam.) Just make sure to read and follow the instructions in the box.
Waxing is the way to go! :) Just take a pain killer 30 mins before your waxing session to help ease the pain :)
what about depilatory creams? if the hair is fine, it should come off easier. i personally don't like how they smell but they're more painless than waxing.
for upper lip hair, i learned to thread them myself (very easy! there a lot of tutorials on youtube) so i can keep them clean even without regular trips to the parlor. alternatively, you can pluck them out (takes longer but easier to manage than self-threading).
i agree that women shouldn't feel coerced into being hair-free but i find underarm hair too itchy. and i'm unhealthily obsessed with grooming my eyebrows, hehe. medyo TMI but i'd just like to share: waxing your genital areas can make you susceptible to infections like UTI. the hair serves as protection kasi but if you really want to wax, just be extra careful with your hygiene and choose a reputable parlor to do it for you.
Go with threading. I used to get my whole face minus my eyebrows threaded. U might want to check if u have PCOS it causes your hormones to go bananas and grow hair on ur face. (hairisum).. Lay Bare does a good job I used to go to the one in katipunan every other week. Threading is better than waxing. Sometimes waxing doesn't get all the hair.. Also it pulls your skin more which can lead to premature wrinkles
love the feedback here! as usual, you guys have the best advice. ;)
I know the OP said that getting rid of hair through laser is not in her option right now, but for those who are thinking about it, go for it!
I had my underarm done when i was 17 and am currently getting other areas done as well. No regrets on the underarm talaga! Just a tip: do not skimp on the cost! I have friends who availed of coupon sites for hair removal, ouch! Ni ice to numb the area wala! Some even got burned because the technician was not knowledgeable.
Dear Fellow Balbon, just go with whatever you're comfortable with. Just because you wax one part of your body doesn't mean you'll have to get rid of your other hair too. If your "moustache" really bothers you, by all means have it removed. If you're not keen on waxing, you can try depilatory cream. They have some that are made specially for your upper lip. But keep in mind this area is quite sensitive, so test on a small area of your face first. I got an allergic reaction to a cream I used on my upper lip before! For me, waxing this area is still the way to go. You get used to the pain after a while, and it hair re-growth is much less.
If you decide to remove your leg hair as well, let me introduce you to this gem of an invention: the epilator. It's like an automatic tweezer that's really easy to use. You can buy it from the States (I got mine from Amazon), but make sure the model you get is 220v and not 110v. I also saw one for sale before at the SM Megamall Department store (they put it in the appliance section - weird!), but I suggest you buy online so you have more choices. Happy hair-zapping! :)
Wow! Everyone's so helpful here. I was actually the one who sent in the question. I promised myself to save enough money for laser but I'm currently unemployed so I have to postpone that. And I'm just 22!
My derma thought I had PCOS but I got an ultrasound and I didnt. Though I do have problems like light to moderate acne. I think, however, this is caused by my facial hair.
My problem with waxing my upper lip is that I have to deal with it growing in between sessions. But thanks to your comments, I have more options to consider! I will definitely research more about the epilator and the self-threading. Do any of you know where to get the epilator and/or the thread here in the country?
One thing's for sure though, I'll definitely go with laser in the future. Again thanks to Ms. Liz and to everyone as well!