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Three things I wish I knew when I graduated

"Do what you love" is perhaps the most trite advice there is for new graduates. It's ok advice but it also encourages the entitlement complex of young people! You don't deserve anything just because you love it. You have to work at it harder than you ever thought you would and you'd have to do it for little money in the beginning. Passion, however, does not guarantee success.

Bottomline: you can't be sure about anything and no one owes you jack shit just because you graduated from school. But there is someone out there who has a vested interest in your success - you. You are the only person who can truly make things happen for yourself. Don't expect anyone else to give you any breaks, because they don't have to.

cheryl tan chua 2

That said, these are three other things I wish I knew when I graduated five years ago. 

1. Your first job should be in the field you truly want to be in. Graduates typically consider two jobs: the job they want, and the job that earns them security/ money. (Lucky if you get both!) They think, "I'm gonna take this okay-paying job first and when I've saved enough I'll go on to be a makeup artist!" Everybody's situation is different but if you're are able to pursue something without you and your family starving to death, you better go for it.

Why? Because the longer you stay in a job you dislike the harder it is to leave it. The more time you spend there, the more time you lose in gaining valuable experience and contacts in the industry you want to be in!

If you spend your first two years in a job you don't like then those two years mean zero in a completely different field of work. Of course, it doesn't all have to be a waste. Spend all your free time doing that thing you love so that when you're ready to leave, you have something to show prospective clients.

2. "Pwede na" should never be an option. When you submit your work, it has to be the culmination of your best effort. I suspect that our generation was conditioned to think that cutting corners and spending the least amount of effort on something is admirable. It's not.

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These are a few of my favorite things (at the moment)

The past week has been more hectic than usual. I organized and executed events for two different clients so I am just dead tired right now. I just wanna lie down and not get up until next week! I'm not saying I don't like my job, it's just that it's not always as glamorous as it might sound. It involves a lot of literal leg work and generous trading of limited social currency. 

At the end of the day, however, I live for the feeling of giving my best work to my clients and friends in the industry. 

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Anyway, I thought I'd keep today's post chill by sharing with you some of the things I'm loving at the moment. I made it a point to include only items I haven't mentioned here yet! I'm probably doing a full review on them next time, but for now here are some of the reasons I pick up these beauties.

Etude House Don't Worry I'm On Your Side Lip Balm. I've actually had this since September last year and I use it ALL THE FREAKIN' TIME. Why I haven't written about it yet, I don't know. But here it is now. :P This is a moisturizing balm that leaves a pretty and long-wearing salmon pink stain on the lips. It's what I used during autumn in Tokyo because the other lippies I brought were just not hydrating enough!

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Money is only funny in a rich man's world

I'm earning a tidy sum of money at 26. I started freelance writing when I was still in college, so I got a good head start and was able to meet a lot of awesome people who gave me valuable opportunities. I'm grateful for them and very lucky, indeed, but the luck would have turned to dust if I didn't work hard and smart everyday.

It's been fun, these last five years, but I seriously have to consider where I put my money. My rent and bills are my biggest expenditures every month - kids, if you're still living with your parents, be extremely grateful for their generosity! Don't be lazy, sweep the floor or wash the dishes when they ask you to. If you lived by yourself, you'd be bleeding money AND sweeping the floor AND washing the dishes every day. 

I remember, when I moved out two weeks after graduation and did my first groceries, I cried in the supermarket. Like a baby. I didn't know things cost so much. 

And then there is shopping. I'm cutting down on that because it's a vicious cycle. I buy stuff but end up not using them as often as I initially thought I would. I think I've been good these last few months because I managed to lessen miscellaneous spending, but the figure could be better. I'm sure I didn't need six shirts in one go.

Why am I sharing all this? I guess I just wanted to give you some context on what my financial goals are.

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Thoughts on temptation and cosmetic procedures

The other day I visited a reputable aesthetic clinic somewhere in The Fort. They do almost everything there, from something as mundane as facials and waxing to more complex treatments like Ulthera (a skin tightening and lifting procedure that uses ultrasound) and cosmetic surgery. I dropped by to try my favorite facial, but before that I settled down to talk with the owner's daughter.

She said she has had Ulthera done on her face, and then showed me a picture with one side finished, mid-procedure. It was dramatically thinner! It was non-surgical too so my jaw almost dropped to the floor! She said she used to have a wide face, and it's probably the same procedure Kim Chiu had to achieve her now-pixie face. This treatment is meant to be done only once a year, and costs about P90,000 per session.

I tell you, I have never been as tempted to alter my face as I had been that time. Cosmetic procedures are more advanced so the pain and downtime are now minimal - the cost is manageable too, if your income is in the upper-middle bracket. It was tempting to try, whether or not the clinic generously offers an x-deal.

This reminds me of a post Regina Belmonte wrote on her Tumblr - it's not about cosmetic procedures per se, but it's related. Regina is Cosmopolitan Philippines' beauty editor-at-large and I believe also editor of The Philippine Star's YStyle Section.

Skinny bitches, feel free to contradict me. Because sometimes, I really, truly, honestly feel that the only reason I don’t have more going for me is that I’m not thin. And in my head, the reasonable half of my brain is like, “That’s stupid, Regina. Your worthiness isn’t dictated by your dress size,” but the less reasonable half still can’t help feeling that way anyway.

THIS. It was a nameless feeling before reading this post, but I feel this way sometimes too (note the operative word okay - sometimes).

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My ultimate weight loss tip

I wanted to write a review post for you but I need to see a doctor today. Oh it's nothing serious - it's just allergies! I've been putting off this visit since last year but I feel I need medication at this point. I don't know what I'm allergic to, just that sometimes I wake up with a runny nose, teary eyes, and crazy sneezing fits. My voice now sounds weird because my throat feels damaged with all the sneezing. My face hurts also when this happens. The quality of my life is already affected! So, I'm off to to Makati Med to look for an allergist or at least anyone who can prescribe something for this.

Anyway. I may have mentioned a few times on IG that I lost some weight. Did I do anything special? Yes, I started to draw and paint again! The more I used my hands, the less I ate. I realized that I eat when I'm bored or when I'm watching TV, so now I try not to get bored and I only watch shows during legit meal times. Simple no? 

 

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Four things that keep me happy

Would you rather be perfect at only one thing, or would you prefer to be mediocre at a lot of things? I'd honestly choose the former because the latter is just frustrating. Modesty aside I can do a lot of things well enough; I can grasp the concept and how it can be done right, but my talent for it can only go so far. Mediocre-far. It kills me but I guess the alternative is worse: being able to do nothing worthy at all.

Anyway! Let's start the week on a positive note. ^_^ I just want to show you some of the things that keep me happy.

I've mentioned I love the movie "Her". I also loved the song in there so I decided to learn it! My version of "The Moon Song" is a combination of the one in the film and the one sung by Karen O. I hope you like it. 

I loved drawing and painting things on paper before I loved painting my face. I've had my eye on Prismacolor and Derwent Inktense pencils for a while so I went ahead and got them for my birthday. They're pretty awesome! The Prismas are super pigmented, while the Derwent ink pencils are truly intense. Studio-level art stuff aren't cheap but worth the investment. Just like makeup, come to think of it!

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Can we please not talk about my weight

There's this magazine editor who ALWAYS greets me, without fail, everytime we meet each other in functions: "Liz, you're so thin! You lost so much weight!" Every. Single. Time. Even when I've gained weight, or even when I haven't actually lost any. There's also another acquaintance of mine who says the same thing every time we see each other. I'm not sure if they're being sarcastic, but I've given this a lot of thought and have come up with three reasons these people open their interactions with me this way.

1. They're just making idle, safe conversation - in their minds, anyway. Opening a conversation with a compliment is a great way to get things going. I myself do this a lot, but of course I am sincere in my flattery. But I don't just mention ONE compliment every time. I compliment what I like as I see it; I don't have a standard opening line.

2. They want me to also notice that they lost weight, too (even if they haven't). It's subtle prodding for a similar compliment.

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Joy

I only have one resolution for 2014, and it's a simple one: joy.

I stayed at my mother's house during the New Year (something I don't often do nowadays) and I looked through all my old stuff. My books, notes, my clothes even. I remember the exhiliration I had back then, that curious feeling of excitement as if something amazing is about to happen real soon. Years passed and all the good things did happen, for the first time. I found joy in all of it.

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Card-making bonanza

Been seeing a lot of new readers lately - hi guys! Thanks for reading and liking my blog. I appreciate the lovely messages you've left as well! :) I thought I'd introduce myself, again. My name is Liz and I obviously love beauty and the things we can use to achieve it. I have a cute pom named Snaps, and in my free time I play video games, read fantasy novels, and recently, make cards.

Yes I've been making cards. Did that catch you off-guard? :P You'll know I've been sorta crazy about it if you've been following my Instagram account. I love putting paper together and coming up with interesting designs. I've kinda toned it down though. When I started card-making, everything was so elaborate. Now I'd rather go for elegance and simplicity.

I honestly don't know how I got into it exactly. I remember buying some stationery and origami paper in Tokyo, then for some reason that got blown waaaay out of proportion.

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The importance of being fiercely smart

More musings about the world I move in. I was at a party last night in what is arguable the hottest bar in Manila at the moment. Everyone is dressed up and ready to dance (it's that kind of event). Well, it's not my scene, but I'm there to sorta work and mingle with people I am acquainted with. It's fun once I got the hang of it. I can talk freely, smile and laugh, and just generally feel comfortable in the noise and the swirl of people around me.

It wasn't like that when I started attending events. "Awkward" is an understatement if you were to describe me! I felt like I didn't belong, that I was wearing the wrong clothes and saying the wrong things. I saw all these glittering, sophisticated people across the room and wondered, can I ever be like them? Do I have what it takes? 

Memories of these doubts came rushing back to me while at an after-party dinner last night. I was with two friends who recently just started working for a magazine.

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Style is all in the head

Dressing beautifully isn't about the clothes you wear or the face and body that you have. It's about being secure in your identity, about being confident and accepting of all the things you are (and are not). This self-awareness combined with self-confidence is then reflected in your attitude towards fashion.

Example, a woman wearing a white t-shirt and a pair of jeans. She can leave the house thinking, "Oh gosh I look so plain and boring", "My shirt makes me look fat", or worse "I'm wearing this so I don't get any attention because I'm not worthy of any attention". She'd be hunched down and timid when dealing with people, and others won't really see her outfit beyond how she sees it herself. 

But then she can also see it differently.

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A rant on silly quotes

I have this perma-rage face when I'm on Facebook, or on Twitter, sometimes. It's just that everyone loves posting these quotes that make me want to tear my hair out! Quotes about anything from religion, politics, love, friendship, to traveling, clothes, and shoes. Oh I love myself a good quote, but is it very hard for people to post ones that make sense? Enough with the one or two-liners that are purposefully vague or ridiculous hasty generalizations. Give me three paragraphs of solid life lessons, if that's what it takes!

(And can they please check the source too.)

I won't discuss religion or politics here because you won't like me very much if I told you what I thought, but I will talk about a recent fashion quote I saw on my timeline. It annoyed me rather badly; I took a few minutes to stew and even considered writing a chilly comment under the photo. But then, what's a blog for? :P

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Ugly in your head

I feel ugly. It's all the stress, the junk food, the inactivity, and the fact that my hair is falling at an alarming rate. I got pimples from this new serum I tried out, so I have fresh blemishes on THE side of my face that I worked months to clear up completely. I haven't been religious with suncreen lately so my skin is uneven. 

I look at my old pictures and think, "Why can't I look like that again?" But then I saw a photo I took just yesterday.

I don't look bad. In fact, I look pretty nice! True, it's the lighting, makeup, angle, and a bit of post-processing to adjust the color - but the thing is I already had something good (i.e. myself) to work on. I know that some people treat makeup with disdain, as if it's exclusively something that women wear to cover up their insecurities. That may be true some of the time but for me, I love makeup because it makes me realize - everyday - that I am not ugly at all.

 

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You want it if you don't have it

I have tried my hand at unrequited love before, and it did not end well (as these things do). I find the whole experience incredibly funny now and wonder "what was I thinking?" during the few odd moments I remember it. But at that time my teenage self was intensely "in love" with her best friend then. He didn't want to hear any of it because he was into pretty girls, not geeky bespectackled ones such as myself!

Sorry, okay, I'm really laughing now. I do miss the kilig moments though, the anticipation to come to class to sit near him. Oh, my youth. I was so foolish, but the rush was worth it - in retrospect. :)

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Roses out of the blue

What would you do if you received a rose from a cute stranger? Beautiful love stories, real or imagined, begin that way. I was having dinner with friends when I received a teal rose from a good-looking dude. It had a small tag that says it's from Jorgen. I don't know who he is but no matter - it made my day!

The guy proceeded to hand out these lovely roses to every girl around our dinner group. I don't know about you, but I believe in the power of fowers. :) Just look at their faces! I'm sure they felt as special as I did upon receiving the rose.

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Stress, shift dresses, (formerly) ridiculous rompers

Today is one of those days when everything moves at a terrible speed. However I'm happy that I'm on top of things and have been able to accomplish all my tasks! I even got to step out for an Artdeco lunch - I couldn't possibly miss it as Artdeco is one of the few brands I've been using since college. There's a new collection out (called Butterfly Dream) and I quite like it.

I'm on Instagram! When I'm in the mood I go crazy documenting things

Anyway! I want to talk about stress (and a few outfits but that's gonna come in later somehow haha). My method isn't that complicated but it works because I know it's 100% true. Are you ready? I just think that everything will be over soon. They usually are.

Tory Burch bag / Zara heels / Tiangge dress / Casio watch

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Advice from a 25 year-old

It's my birthday today. I was going to keep it a secret, because I have this wistful desire to be greeted only by people who know when my birthday is without Facebook telling them when. But that's unfair isn't it? Everyone is too busy, too souped up with tons of other more important information than my birthday.

So, thank you in advance for the greetings! I appreciate that you took the time to acknowledge the day I popped out of my mum's belly - literally. Cesarean section. (If you ask me you should greet my mother instead, she got the tough end of the stick that day - not me! Level unlocked for her! I'm the first-born.)

When my clients and business contacts first find out I'm only this age, they ask me "You're so young! How are you able to pull this off?" That's not verbatim but I know that's what they want to know. I'm not rich or famous, okay, but I would like to think that I enjoy a modest amount of success at 25. 

I learned a few things along the way. Here's my advice on how to be where you want to be. (Cliches may or may not be included.)

 

Do what you love best. Do it now. One of the scariest things I've done so far was quitting my first (and only) full-time job after only eight months. I was only 22, I haven't paid my dues, I didn't know if I could make it as a freelancer since I wasn't acquainted with many people who could give me projects then. But I felt nothing towards my desk job. I had to drag my feet to the office everyday!

Now I like a lot of things, but there is one thing that I'm passionate about: writing. I'm a good writer. I'm not gonna win any Pulitzers but I sure as hell know how to write copy and engaging blog posts!

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