Monday Musings: What it means when I skip the eyebrow makeup

"You know we're true friends if you've seen me without kilay." I say this as a punchline in any random conversation, but I am deadly serious. Only my closest friends have seen me without eyebrows in person (bare eyebrows on the blog doesn't count! Because before/afters must be legit!). It means that I trust them not to give a shit about my face because they know me so well that how I look is ultimately inconsequential to our relationship.

We all wear masks. Some masks are thinner and more real in front of other people; some masks are so opaque that you can't tell who is underneath. Some masks become our core, overtime, and become part of our identity. I don't think that's a bad thing. I believe that it's necessary to wear different faces to cope with different types of situations and people. It's not being fake to show one facet of your personality at a time, it's just practical. And it's still you. Just not necessarily all of you in one go.

Dissolution / Watercolor on paper by Liz Lanuzo

So really, don't worry about the times you feel like you're not being "true" to yourself. There's a difference between lying about who you are and merely showing a part of who you are. 

I just read this to James and he pointed out that this keeps us from forming deep relationships with other people. My answer is that yes, my love, that is why I take my eyebrows off in front of those who matter to me.

And don't draw them back on.